Wednesday, June 15, 2011

My motivation

I'm tired.  Tired of feeling fat, looking fat, surfing the internet for the quickest way to lose weight....tired of not fitting into my clothes, tired of not wanting to go out in public, tired, tired, tired.....

These are just weight related reasons I'm tired.  I'm also a working mom of two kids.  Juggling a travel schedule for work, my kids school and recreation schedules and all that goes with running  a household -  leave me collapsing into my bed each night - just to get up and do it again the next day.

I decided to start this blogging after reading Half Assed, a weight loss memoir, by Jennette Fulda.  I'm not trying to sell you her book (let me interject right now that at no point in this journey will I be trying to sell you something)  - but I feel compelled to explain to you (or myself) why I'm suddenly writing these thoughts down on the internet.

I'm not comparing myself to Jen (aka - the pastaqueen) in any way.  I don't have half my body weight to lose, I'm not single....I'm not a writer.  I just related to her.  She talks about being addicted to sugar, being embarassed to go out in public, and how difficult it is to lose weight.  Even though my goal is to lose 30 lbs...which to someone who needs to lose 100 doesn't seem like me, now in my life, it seems impossible.

Being 30 lbs overweight has changed my life.  It's changed me.  I'm depressed, I hate going out, I'm embarassed.

So....what's the point of the blog?  I need to start somewhere.  Reading about dieting isn't helping me.  I need to put a plan in action.  This blog is step one.  I don't know what step two is yet - but if I can take a step (however small it may be) each day - I hope to find myself in a much better place (emotionally and physically) sometime in the near future.

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